MOM HANDED ME A BIG ENVELOPE SAYING I GOT IT IN THE MAIL AND BEING A SMART ASS I SAID ‘WHAT IS IT FROM THE PRESIDENT’ AND IT’S FROM THE FUCKING WHITE HOUSE
APPARENTLY THEY SENT THIS BACK BECAUSE I WAS A SHIT AND INVITED THEM TO MY HIGH SCHOOL GRADUATION
what do you call a mouse wearing a purple hat
fine fuck you guys yall re missing out on some quality humour
if this hits 1,000 notes ill say the answer
my sense of style is
“fuck im late”
“what is this”
“i love this shirt im gonna wear it for 2 weeks straight”
wTF MY 7 YEAR OLD SISTER JUST CAME INTO MY ROOM AND GESTURED FOR ME TO FOLLOW HER AND DIDNT SAY ANYTHING SO I DID AND SHE LEAD ME INTO THE BACKYARD AND SHE SAID “IM GOING TO SHOW YOU MY SECRET” AND I WAS LIKE “WHAT OK” AND SHE TOOK THE LID OFF HER PORTABLE SANDBOX AND IT WAS FILLED WITH WATER AND LIKE THOUSANDS OF TINY BABY TADPOLES SWIMMING AROUND AND I WAS LIKE WHAT WHERE DID YOU GET THESE AND SHE SAID “iM RAISING THEM”
